Down the Rabbit Hole...

During an insomniac night a night or so ago, I was tossing, turning, and obsessing. "What if... How will I... Oh, no... What will happen... Should I... Why didn't I think to..." and on and on...and on and on...

Trying to settle or quell run-away anxiety is a thankless, exhausting, depleting task. To say the least.

Anxiety, I've decided, is a rabbit. If I like, I can believe that catching the rabbit is possible and I can run fast and furious to chase the bunny. I can race across the field, trip, fall down the rabbit hole, and much like Alice in Wonderland, end up in a strange and terrifying dream world. Or, as I have been practicing this week, I can simply say to myself each time an anxiety-producing thought pops up, "DO NOT CHASE THE RABBIT".

After all, chasing the rabbit is, especially at first, seductive and intoxicating. I always whole-heartedly believe, every time, even though it has NEVER worked, that I can track down and stop my anxiety by chasing and then catching the anxiety. I say to myself, "You're mine, this time, rabbit!" Instead, the chase is endless, and I get winded, exhausted, dizzied, and overwhelmed. I lose track of time, goals, reason, sense, and myself.

Chasing doesn't work. Stopping the chase does. If I start wondering what's going in a relationship, or what will happen in the future, or...I simply stop myself and say firmly, "DO NOT CHASE THE RABBIT" and return to whatever I need to be doing right now. It's worked wonders.